Office skills joke

"So tell me, Mrs. Smith," asked the interviewer, "have you any other skills you think might be worth mentioning?"

"Actually, yes," said the applicant modestly. "Last year I had two short stories published in national magazines, and I finished my novel."

"Very impressive," he commented, "but I was thinking of skills you could apply during office hours."

Mrs. Smith explained brightly, "Oh, that was during office hours."

Password Rejected

A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.

Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'penis'.

Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response:

PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH!

My Project Desk

My Project Desk (MPD) is an online Project Management & Collaboration solution developed in PHP/ MySQL by Konstant Infosolutions. They describe My Project Desk as "... a nice place for managing projects & interacting with employees. Take MPD as your personal assistant...!" As of today, MPD if proprietary and is used by Konstant with its clients only to keep track of the projects being developed by Konstant for its clients. The clients are provided with access to MPD so as to keep track of the tasks assigned to developers and post any query or bug. Find the comprehensive list of the features of MPD here.

My Project Desk runs on the servers of Konstant Info Solutions and the clients have the facility to directly interact with the members of the team which is working upon their projects.

• Discussing details
• Generatin To-Do lists
• Milestones
• Sending messages
• Sharing files
• Tracking projects
• Writing on-board for Future Reference

Hilarious - Don't need much help

Hilarious employee joke showing what happens in an office:

Manager: Sorry,but I can't give u a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!!

Office joke: New office

Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door. Conscious of his new position, the colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, then said into the phone, "Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir."

"Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he asked, "What do you want?"

"Nothing important, sir," the airman replied, ... "I'm just here to hook up your telephone."

Zoho Office Suite

The Zoho Office Suite is a free & Web- based online office suite containing word processing, spreadsheets, presentations, databases, note-taking, wikis, CRM, project management, invoicing and other applications developed by AdventNet Inc., an India based company. It was launched in 2005 with a web-based word processor. Additional products, such as spreadsheets and presentations were incorporated later into Zoho. Although some applications, such as Zoho CRM and Zoho Projects, require a fee to be used, Zoho maintains that it has a commitment to "maintaining a free tier of entry-level applications with free registration."

Zoho uses an open Application Programming Interface for its Writer, Sheet, Show, Creator, Meeting, and Planner products. Google Gears, an application developed by Google that "enables more powerful web applications, by adding new features to your web browser." It also has plugins into Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, an OpenOffice plugin, and a plugin for Firefox.

The Zoho Office Suite can be used together with the Project Management tool & CRM to manage the employess and their tasks in a better way. Zoho can be installed on your servers as well for a fee.

dotProject for Project Management

dotProject is a web-based, multi-user, multi-language, open-source Project Management application designed in PHP & MySQL. It's free for any uses and is maintained by an open community of volunteer programmers across the globe. The developers who started with dotProject are Adam Donnison, Karen Chisholm, Gregor Erhardt, Ivan Peevski, Eamon Brosnan & Benjamin Young. It started as an open-source replacement to Microsoft Project and has the following features:

• Projects and Tasks
• Companies, Departments and Contacts
• ToDo lists
• Resources
• Forums
• Gantt charts
• Access control via ACL
• Reporting
• History of all activities
• Calendar