Hilarious - Don't need much help

Hilarious employee joke showing what happens in an office:

Manager: Sorry,but I can't give u a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!!

Office joke: New office

Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door. Conscious of his new position, the colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, then said into the phone, "Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir."

"Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he asked, "What do you want?"

"Nothing important, sir," the airman replied, ... "I'm just here to hook up your telephone."

Zoho Office Suite

The Zoho Office Suite is a free & Web- based online office suite containing word processing, spreadsheets, presentations, databases, note-taking, wikis, CRM, project management, invoicing and other applications developed by AdventNet Inc., an India based company. It was launched in 2005 with a web-based word processor. Additional products, such as spreadsheets and presentations were incorporated later into Zoho. Although some applications, such as Zoho CRM and Zoho Projects, require a fee to be used, Zoho maintains that it has a commitment to "maintaining a free tier of entry-level applications with free registration."

Zoho uses an open Application Programming Interface for its Writer, Sheet, Show, Creator, Meeting, and Planner products. Google Gears, an application developed by Google that "enables more powerful web applications, by adding new features to your web browser." It also has plugins into Microsoft Word, Microsoft Excel, an OpenOffice plugin, and a plugin for Firefox.

The Zoho Office Suite can be used together with the Project Management tool & CRM to manage the employess and their tasks in a better way. Zoho can be installed on your servers as well for a fee.

dotProject for Project Management

dotProject is a web-based, multi-user, multi-language, open-source Project Management application designed in PHP & MySQL. It's free for any uses and is maintained by an open community of volunteer programmers across the globe. The developers who started with dotProject are Adam Donnison, Karen Chisholm, Gregor Erhardt, Ivan Peevski, Eamon Brosnan & Benjamin Young. It started as an open-source replacement to Microsoft Project and has the following features:

• Projects and Tasks
• Companies, Departments and Contacts
• ToDo lists
• Resources
• Forums
• Gantt charts
• Access control via ACL
• Reporting
• History of all activities
• Calendar
  

Sugar CRM

Sugar CRM is an online tool with which your employees can manage their data, meetings, emails and customer relationships. Basically, it's a SaaS (Software as a Service) which can be used by employees in a step towards Paperless Office. Available in Sugar Community Edition, Sugar Express, Sugar Professional and Sugar Enterprise versions, Sugar CRM is deployed on your servers and you can use it for:

• Account Management
• Activity Management
• Case Management
• Contact Management
• Email Marketing
• Forecasting
• Inbound Mail
• Knowledgebase
• Lead Management
• Marketing Analytics
• Multi-Channel Campaigns
• Opportunity Management
• Project Management
• Quotes & Contracts
• Self Service Portal
• Workflow Management
  

What obstacles stop employees performing to best effect

The management of the company should distribute questionnaires seeking answers about what employees are tolerating in their work & home lives. This technique is known to motivate employees as they feel lighter after sharing the worst parts. The company can eliminate practices that zap motivation.

Share company's primary goal

The employees of any company get more motivated when they understand the primary aim of the company they are working with. If the employer asks questions to its employees about how clear they are about the company's principles, priorities & mission the employer would get to know what does the employees think of the company and how motivated they are in taking initiatives. It has been seen that when the management of a company shares vision, values & aim with the employees of their company, the employees feel more motivated and their performance comes out in a better way.